Saturday, August 21, 2010

warning: long emo ranting post.

stayed up till now, thought you could come pick me straight up and we could have met.
guess i was too tired, to have not think of taking mrt or cabbing down to go find you when the fastest time for you to reach my house is 3pm and isn't feasible for us since i'm going out to pray at 7pm.
and guess it's my fault, that i didnt sleep earlier and wake up around this time.
yup, you're right.
once i'm asleep, how it'll be impossible for me to just sleep for 2 hours.
so this, i admit.
i didnt think of that.
sorry, cos i'm stupid like that. :/

thought today will be a good saturday.
but it's now ruined by your insensitive 'jokes'.

been quite some time since my last mood swing and our last quarrel.
i've been trying to keep my mood up and positive for you.
trying to stay cheer, and not read too much into the things you joke about at times.

but this is it.
thanks for your 'hilarious' jokes.
apologies are not enough to bring back smiles on my face, at least not today.

i just thought you will reply me with something 'jokingly' about my ass getting grope by some strangers.
yet to you, it's an 'expected' incident.

perhaps you're too experienced in clubbing, thus your reaction over the phone.
not even stunned that someone touched my ass.
not even angry, to my surprise.

right after someone touched my ass in the club, i told the girls.
they were shocked and disgusted by the act.
immediately, i thought of messaging you even when you're overseas working.
pocky babe was like saying,'wah you dare to tell your boyfriend ah? later he angry or what...'
upon hearing that, i deleted the words that i typed to;
Fine i guess, dont know if i felt a hand or what..

i remembered that i told you only recently, that i actually do not like you to say me '小龙包' in front of your friends and families.
and told you, how much it hurt my pride.
i mean like. i already know how flat chested i am.
you dont have to rub salt against my wounds.
though you said you dont mind but in actual fact, i do. greatly.

worse, you said,
'see la, next time can only go clubbing with me around. 
without me around, later other people touch your boobs how? 
but already also won't feel anything one la.'
thankyousomuch darling, your 'joke' made me feel SO much better about myself.

"i apologise for tt cos I forgot u don like it... Sorry..."

oh, does that means that you say that without thinking how your words would have hurt me, yet again? (T_T)
did not know whatever i said can be so easily forgotten.

i thought i was the only one suffering from short term memory.

my fault for being unwise.
my fault for kicking up a fuss over something you deem as nothing.

i'm not angst because i did not have enough rest.
simply disappointed and upset of you said.
end of story.

let's not meet today.


  1. dun be sad.. guys are always like dat de.. soooo insensitive ...




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